Fun With Numbers!

James:...Okay, carry the 7...and divide by...

Me: What are you working on?

James: Just finishing some statistics.

Me: Statistics? About what?

James: Just odd things that I've noticed.

Me: Such as?

James: Such as....Were you aware that 73.23% of your day at home is spent with a talking animal of some sort on the TV?

Me: Really?

James: Yep. And also that 4 out of 7 of my nap times are actually spent awake, making shadow puppets on the wall that resemble various objects that share the shape of an arm? Like a snake or an eel or the Washington monument or an arm....

Me: What?

James: Oh, here's a fun one! 26.29% of the people that meet you think that you smell like rice pudding.

Me: I can't remember the last time I even had rice pudding!

James: Hmmm. I would definitely check into that...And 33.33% of your children don't think you're funny....

Me: Who?

James: I'm just reporting the facts...This one is fairly odd. When asked, the average baby in this house would rather eat a dead skunk's back thigh than to ever eat that stuff you try to pass off as tuna noodle casserole...(mouthing words) It's really bad...

Me: That's weird. Your mom says it's bad too...

James: How interesting! Because I have also learned that 97.87% of the time, Mom is right and you are wrong.

Me: Well, here's a statistic for you, Baby Einstein. 50% of the people in this room have poop in their pants.

James: ...That's just mean....